Onto 3rd Visit...

Okay Trolls...Save your negative comments and go read an older post to which I've dedicated a blog just for you.

We didn't go see a second child and opted to move ahead with a third visit.  There was a couple of girls that sparked our interest but the person we were dealing with insisted that one of the girls was so mentally delayed she's started to regress and that she would never speak.

 (One of the problems is hearing that children don't speak is very common here, in fact a couple we've been in contact with, thanks to my tutor,who adopted a boy from the Ukraine was told he would didn't speak.  The boy walked into the room and said HI).

The fact that we were told the girl was regressing made me question what was going on as there could be a lot of reasons for this regression, and I wanted time to confer with my Aunt who is respected in the world of child mental health and helping children with both mental and phyiscal disabilties.  We decided we would not visit a child and move onto our third appointment as we quickly learned that the other girl who sparked our interest had a habit of strangling cats.  Considering we have pets at home and other children we decided against this girl.  We do wish her well tho.

If there are no more proposals for girls in our age group on our last visit (we have only been approved for ages 5-8 which is a very tight window) we will go and see the regressing/not speaking girl and decide if we would be right for her.

Thank you to all who have been praying, keeping postive thoughts, sending good wishes and blessings our ways. May God Bless You All!

Kiev...

I love Kiev!  It is small compared to Toronto (which is a plus for me) and the driving here makes me never want to step inside a car but I have fallen in love with the city.  There is a charm to the city that makes smile, with hidden gems down newly discovered streets around us.  As a lover of the old world and this is my first time setting foot across the ocean and I am not disappointed.

Today Dale & I just sat in the middle of the square and took in the sights while we were waiting for a bus tour that didn't happen.  The statues, and moments alone are simply breathtaking, but for me it is a staircase that winds down into a lower street that has an arched passageway set into the wall.  The passage way has long since been blocked up but there is a poetic charm to it that inspires my imagination.

The countryside isn't that different than then Canada, but the houses are gated in, and to all my suburban friends in the villages it is very common to see chickens in the patch of grass in front of the gates.  There are goats, cows, sheep, geese, and the occasional turkey too.  The fields are unmarked by fences and shepherds are often seen tending to their herds.

The Ukraine is a beautiful country, with horse drawn wagons, it is a mix of old and new with a less regulated society.  I am enjoying myself immensely and the food here is wonderful.  I am glad I learned Russian it has been helpful in naviagating around but even Dale who didn't study nearly as much is muddling his way around just fine.

Annoying Trolls...

Life is hard, it is never smooth sailing.  I loath people who think that if it isn't easy you should just stop.  If that were the case we would never have plumbing, electricty, cars,and I would hate to think of what the world would be like if people didn't stand up to their oppressors.  Do you know how many failures, heartache and disapointment they experienced because what they were doing mattered to them, how many people probably said to them they should just give up?

To those of you who insist, hint and down right commend the process I am taking I pity you for I think you must have never taken a stand in life.  Where is your courage? Where do you stand in the storms?  Cowering under a shelter watching others struggles and smirk to yourself saying "that is their lot."
as you watch others offer aid to those in need.

This is my stand.  This is my storm, and I will venture out and embrace the hardship of adoption, for it isn't for the faint of heart.  Adoption isn't about finding a perfect child, it is about finding the right family for a child.  There is a lot of hurt, and heartbreak that will take years of healing that adoptive parents need to be prepared for, and deal with the emotional scarring that will last a life time. 

We are looking a child who our family would be right for. It would be selfish to do otherwise.

First Strike out...

We are on our way back to the Kiev, sigh.  We met one of the sweetest 6yr old girls who reminded me very much of a foster child who stayed with us until she was adopted.  The girl we saw was healthy, had an engaging personality, but she was delayed mentally I'd classify her with a moderate to severe delay.  She didn't talk, or at least she could say Ma and cluck her tounge,and she undestood most of what was being said.  She seemed to take in everything.  Her story is very similar to the foster child I compare her too, and though she is delayed, it was my opinion that with the right set of parents she could become moderate to high functioning in society.

She has been in the orphange since she was just over 3yrs, and was very much like a six month old infant developmentally when they received her.

 However, Dale who doesn't have the same experience with special needs children wasn't convinced.  I'm not saying that I am an expert, She has made progress within the orphanage, she can feed, dress herself, is toilet trained, and walking, (albiet she is still a little clumsy).  She is very eager to please and showed herself to be patient with herself and those around her with not a single sign of aggression which is all too common in children with such a delay, in my books this is highly in her favour!  She didn't get frustrated when the stacking cups she was trying to attempt wasn't going well.  The orphanage personal did admit that she isn't getting all the help she needs from them.  I would have been willing to work with her, but Dale wasn't comfortable so I concided. 

We both need to be in agreement, but whoever parents this girl will have one of the most rewarding experiences in their life.  I am praying very hard for this child.

In The Ukraine???

I didn't think we would have made it here, but somehow we are.  Our family booked a trip to Cuba two weeks ago, (non refundable) and within half an hour of coming home our agency called.  Dale had worked out some of the kinks and now here we are.

Dale missed Cuba, to all of our disappointment and I flew four countries in 24 hours to get here, jet lag hasn't set in, while Dale is struggling with the lack of sleep.

I'm in a state of disbelief and shock at us being here and doing this.  I was so certain this wasn't going to happen.  We've had our first appt with the SDA (I believe that is what it is called)  And we are off to collect our paperwork in a few minutes.

My Russia is passable at least and I can pick up a few words, we had no hot water here, and that I could say we needed some, was awesome.  Dale and I picked up a couple of colouring books, and the detail to the Disney Princesses' dresses was beautiful, I would love to buy more of them, because I know my niece would love them.

On a side note, our translator, and cordinator are wonderful, so happy to have them. Thank you for all of your support, prayers and words of comfort.