Friday, 8 June 2012

Dear Anon...

Anonymous7 June 2012 21:50 (We're Home)

OMG!! How horrible of Ontario to have put in place best practice requirements based on *GASP* best practices!! It is so awful that Ontario puts regulations in place that statistically increase the odds an adoption will succeed!! What are they thinking ?!?

It'd be sooooo much better if it could be an adoption free for all like in the USA. You could've brought home a kiddo only to disrupt a few months later like Autumn Winkle (buh-bye Yuri) and Kari Reilly (auf wiederstein Victor!!), and blog about how kicking the newly adopted kiddo you promised to be a "forever family" for is exactly the same thing that Jesus would have done!!!


OMG!! You are absolutely right.  If a family has TWINS, QUADS, SIXTUPLETS, what in heavens are they to do?  I mean they are all the same age!!! And couples who already have kids from previously marriages!  **GASP** How do they fit in with Ontario's Best Practice guidelines? 

Give me a BREAK!  There are many kinds of families, and not all of them fit into Ontario's Best Practice Guidelines.  I also believe that adopting older children who's age may be the same as another is fine too.  To put these practices and make them applicable to ALL adoptive families isn't fair, especially when it is bases on statics, and not indiviuals.  I know what would work for my family and so does our adoption practitioner. 

If I can make a difference, if I can make one person's life better, if I can offer a parentless child at home to call their own and accept them for who they are, the good and the bad, then shouldn't I try?

Yes it might fail and be disrupted, everyone has a breaking point.  We have talked about this, and we have even put our adoptions plans on hold as we learned about the issues we may be facing.  We've discussed our concerns, we're educated as we can be, and we have support systems in place should we need them.  As for the other families you mentioned, I don't know their situtation to comment.

But I do worry about people like you and the impact you create with your words.  You cast them out there like poison darts to people you know nothing of.


  1. Amen to that, Veronica!

    Dear Anonymous: As an American adoptive parent of a Ukrainian child I can assure you that, while the process was indeed a wild ride, it was no "free-for-all" and EZ Pass to any child we thought we might want We were thoroughly screened, both by our US Homestudy Agency and the Ukrainian Government, and thoroughly advised about the issues we could face in adopting a (then) 12-year old boy. We had hosted him the previous summer and that was indeed a helpful experience.

    But to pass judgment on ALL adoptive and potential adoptive parents by lumping them together with two well-publicized adoptions that went horribly wrong (and in which the adoptive parents did not seek out appropriate and available resources) is completely and utterly ignorant. It is like pointing to people who dump their newborns in bathroom stalls or trash cans and taking the ludicrous position that because of their actions no one should have babies, or, if they are to be allowed to have babies, the process must be governed by "best practices" in terms of timing of pregnancies, etc.

    Does the Ontario Government also prescribe mandatory time limits between pregnancies? Does it prohibit giving birth to twins, triplets, etc.? Does it prohibit the integration of children of the same age in blended families brought about by divorce and re-marriage? Oh No, it doesn't? Why not? What makes adoptive families so different?

    Shame on you, Anonymous, but I guess I shouldn't be surprised. You purport to be an authority on adoption, but if you had any guts and the courage of your so-called conviction you'd identify yourself

  2. We adopted an almost 16 year old, who was 9 months older than our oldest biological child. Our boys are only 3 months apart. When we pursued our son we had three possible birthdates and didn't know for sure until we picked up the actual referral and were on a train to meet him! Both are doing well in our family now 3 years and 5 years home. I am so sorry for your difficult process in trying to do the right thing. For all the scoffers- you are DOING something about the problem of others, may God bless you for it!